The Expedition of Humphry Clinker
by
Tobias Smollett

Part 6 out of 8



city, in the harbour of which I have seen above one hundred ships
lying all together. You must know, I had the curiosity to cross
the Frith in a passage boat, and stayed two days in Fife, which
is remarkably fruitful in corn, and exhibits a surprising number
of fine seats, elegantly built, and magnificently furnished.
There is an incredible number of noble houses in every part of
Scotland that I have seen. -- Dalkeith, Pinkie, Yester, and lord
Hopton's [Hopetoun's], all of them within four or five miles of
Edinburgh, are princely palaces, in every one of which a
sovereign might reside at his case. -- I suppose the Scots affect
these monuments of grandeur. -- If I may be allowed to mingle
censure with my remarks upon a people I revere, I must observe,
that their weak side seems to be vanity. -- I am afraid that even
their hospitality is not quite free of ostentation. I think I
have discovered among them uncommon pains taken to display their
fine linen, of which, indeed, they have great plenty, their
furniture, plate, housekeeping, and variety of wines, in which
article, it must be owned, they are profuse, if not prodigal -- A
burgher of Edinburgh, not content to vie with a citizen of
London, who has ten times his fortune, must excel him in the
expence as well as elegance of his entertainments.

Though the villas of the Scotch nobility and gentry have
generally an air of grandeur and state, I think their gardens and
parks are not comparable to those of England; a circumstance the
more remarkable, as I was told by the ingenious Mr Phillip Miller
of Chelsea, that almost all the gardeners of South-Britain were
natives of Scotland. The verdure of this country is not equal to
that of England. -- The pleasure-grounds are, in my opinion, not so
well laid out according to the genius loci; nor are the lawns,
and walks, and hedges kept in such delicate order. -- The trees are
planted in prudish rows, which have not such an agreeable natural
effect, as when they are thrown into irregular groupes, with
intervening glades; and firs, which they generally raise around
their houses, look dull and funereal in the summer season. -- I
must confess, indeed, that they yield serviceable timber, and
good shelter against the northern blasts; that they grow and
thrive in the most barren soil, and continually perspire a fine
balsam of turpentine, which must render the air very salutary and
sanative to lungs of a tender texture.

Tabby and I have been both frightened in our return by sea from
the coast of Fife -- She was afraid of drowning, and I of catching
cold, in consequence of being drenched with sea-water; but my
fears as well as hers, have been happily disappointed. She is now
in perfect health; I wish I could say the same of Liddy --
Something uncommon is the matter with that poor girl; her colour
fades, her appetite fails, and her spirits flag -- She is become
moping and melancholy, and is often found in tears -- Her brother
suspects internal uneasiness on account of Wilson, and denounces
vengeance against that adventurer. -- She was, it seems, strongly
affected at the ball by the sudden appearance of one Mr Gordon,
who strongly resembles the said Wilson; but I am rather
suspicious that she caught cold by being overheated with
dancing. -- I have consulted Dr Gregory, an eminent physician of an
amiable character, who advises the highland air, and the use of
goat-milk whey, which, surely, cannot have a bad effect upon a
patient who was born and bred among the mountains of Wales -- The
doctors opinion is the more agreeable, as we shall find those
remedies in the very place which I proposed as the utmost extent
of our expedition -- I mean the borders of Argyle.

Mr Smollett, one of the judges of the commissary court, which is
now sitting, has very kindly insisted upon our lodging at his
country-house, on the banks of Lough-Lomond, about fourteen miles
beyond Glasgow. For this last city we shall set out in two days,
and take Stirling in our way, well provided with recommendations
from our friends at Edinburgh, whom, I protest, I shall leave
with much regret. I am so far from thinking it any hardship to
live in this country, that, if I was obliged to lead a town life,
Edinburgh would certainly be the headquarters of


Yours always,
MATT. BRAMBLE
EDIN., August 8.



To Sir WATKIN PHILLIPS, Bart. of Jesus college, Oxon.

DEAR KNIGHT,

I am now little short of the Ultima Thule, if this appellation
properly belongs to the Orkneys or Hebrides. These last are now
lying before me, to the amount of some hundreds, scattered up and
down the Deucalidonian sea, affording the most picturesque and
romantic prospect I ever beheld -- I write this letter in a
gentleman's house, near the town of Inverary which may be deemed
the capital of the West Highlands, famous for nothing so much as
for the stately castle begun, and actually covered in by the late
duke of Argyle, at a prodigious expence -- Whether it will ever be
completely finished is a question. --

But, to take things in order -- We left Edinburgh ten days ago; and
the further North we proceed, we find Mrs Tabitha the less
manageable; so that her inclinations are not of the nature of the
loadstone; they point not towards the pole. What made her leave
Edinburgh with reluctance at last, if we may believe her own
assertions, was a dispute which she left unfinished with Mr
Moffat, touching the eternity of hell torments. That gentleman,
as he advanced in years, began to be sceptical on this head,
till, at length, he declared open war against the common
acceptation of the word eternal. He is now persuaded, that
eternal signifies no more than an indefinite number of years; and
that the most enormous sinner may be quit for nine millions, nine
hundred thousand, nine hundred and ninety-nine years of hell-
fire; which term or period, as he very well observes, forms but
an inconsiderable drop, as it were, in the ocean of eternity -- For
this mitigation he contends, as a system agreeable to the ideas
of goodness and mercy, which we annex to the supreme Being -- Our
aunt seemed willing to adopt this doctrine in favour of the
wicked; but he hinted that no person whatever was so righteous as
to be exempted entirely from punishment in a future state; and
that the most pious Christian upon earth might think himself very
happy to get off for a fast of seven or eight thousand years in
the midst of fire and brimstone. Mrs Tabitha revolted at this
dogma, which filled her at once with horror and indignation -- She
had recourse to the opinion of Humphry Clinker, who roundly
declared it was the popish doctrine of purgatory, and quoted
scripture in defence of the fire everlasting, prepared for the
devil and his angels -- The reverend master Mackcorkendal, and all
the theologists and saints of that persuasion were consulted, and
some of them had doubts about the matter; which doubts and
scruples had begun to infect our aunt, when we took our departure
from Edinburgh.

We passed through Linlithgow, where there was an elegant royal
palace, which is now gone to decay, as well as the town itself --
This too is pretty much the case with Stirling, though it still
boasts of a fine old castle in which the kings of Scotland were
wont to reside in their minority -- But Glasgow is the pride of
Scotland, and, indeed, it might very well pass for an elegant and
flourishing city in any part of Christendom. There we had the
good fortune to be received into the house of Mr Moore, an
eminent surgeon, to whom we were recommended by one of our
friends at Edinburgh; and, truly, he could not have done us more
essential service -- Mr Moore is a merry facetious companion,
sensible and shrewd, with a considerable fund of humour; and his
wife an agreeable woman, well bred, kind, and obliging. Kindness,
which I take to be the essence of good-nature and humanity, is
the distinguishing characteristic of the Scotch ladies in their
own country -- Our landlord shewed us every thing, and introduced
us to all the world at Glasgow; where, through his
recommendation, we were complimented with the freedom of the
town. Considering the trade and opulence of this place, it cannot
but abound with gaiety and diversions. Here is a great number of
young fellows that rival the youth of the capital in spirit and
expence; and I was soon convinced, that all the female beauties
of Scotland were not assembled at the hunters ball in Edinburgh --
The town of Glasgow flourishes in learning as well as in
commerce -- Here is an university, with professors in all the
different branches of science, liberally endowed, and judiciously
chosen -- It was vacation time when I passed, so that I could not
entirely satisfy my curiosity; but their mode of education is
certainly preferable to ours in some respects. The students are
not left to the private instruction of tutors; but taught in
public schools or classes, each science by its particular
professor or regent.

My uncle is in raptures with Glasgow -- He not only visited all the
manufactures of the place, but made excursions all round to
Hamilton, Paisley, Renfrew, and every other place within a dozen
miles, where there was any thing remarkable to be seen in art or
nature. I believe the exercise, occasioned by those jaunts, was
of service to my sister Liddy, whose appetite and spirits begin
to revive -- Mrs Tabitha displayed her attractions as usual, and
actually believed she had entangled one Mr Maclellan, a rich
inkle-manufacturer, in her snares; but when matters came to an
explanation, it appeared that his attachment was altogether
spiritual, founded upon an intercourse of devotion, at the
meeting of Mr John Wesley; who, in the course of his evangelical
mission, had come hither in person -- At length, we set out for the
banks of Lough-Lomond, passing through the little borough of
Dumbarton, or (as my uncle will have it) Dunbritton, where there
is a castle, more curious than any thing of the kind I had ever
seen. It is honoured with a particular description by the elegant
Buchanan, as an arx inexpugnabilis, and, indeed, it must have
been impregnable by the antient manner of besieging. It is a rock
of considerable extent, rising with a double top, in an angle
formed by the confluence of two rivers, the Clyde and the Leven;
perpendicular and inaccessible on all sides, except in one place
where the entrance is fortified; and there is no rising ground in
the neighbourhood from whence it could be damaged by any kind of
battery.

From Dumbarton, the West Highlands appear in the form of huge,
dusky mountains, piled one over another; but this prospect is not
at all surprising to a native of Glamorgan -- We have fixed our
headquarters at Cameron, a very neat country-house belonging to
commissary Smollet, where we found every sort of accommodation we
could desire -- It is situated like a Druid's temple, in a grove of
oak, close by the side of Lough-Lomond, which is a surprising
body of pure transparent water, unfathomably deep in many places,
six or seven miles broad, four and twenty miles in length,
displaying above twenty green islands, covered with wood; some of
them cultivated for corn, and many of them stocked with red deer --
They belong to different gentlemen, whose seats are scattered
along the banks of the lake, which are agreeably romantic beyond
all conception. My uncle and I have left the women at Cameron, as
Mrs Tabitha would by no means trust herself again upon the water,
and to come hither it was necessary to cross a small inlet of the
sea, in an open ferry-boat -- This country appears more and more
wild and savage the further we advance; and the People are as
different from the Low-land Scots, in their looks, garb, and
language, as the mountaineers of Brecknock are from the
inhabitants of Herefordshire.

When the Lowlanders want to drink a chearupping-cup, they go to
the public house, called the Change-house, and call for a chopine
of two-penny, which is a thin, yeasty beverage, made of malt; not
quite so strong as the table-beer of England, -- This is brought in
a pewter stoop, shaped like a skittle, from whence it is emptied
into a quaff; that is, a curious cup made of different pieces of
wood, such as box and ebony, cut into little staves, joined
alternately, and secured with delicate hoops, having two cars or
handles -- It holds about a gill, is sometimes tipt round the mouth
with silver, and has a plate of the same metal at bottom, with
the landlord's cypher engraved. -- The Highlanders, on the
contrary, despise this liquor, and regale themselves with whisky;
a malt spirit, as strong as geneva, which they swallow in great
quantities, without any signs of inebriation. They are used to it
from the cradle, and find it an excellent preservative against
the winter cold, which must be extreme on these mountains -- I am
told that it is given with great success to infants, as a cordial
in the confluent smallpox, when the eruption seems to flag, and
the symptoms grow unfavourable -- The Highlanders are used to eat
much more animal food than falls to the share of their neighbours
in the Low-country -- They delight in hunting; have plenty of deer
and other game, with a great number of sheep, goats, and black-cattle
running wild, which they scruple not to kill as vension,
without being much at pains to ascertain the property.

Inverary is but a poor town, though it stands immediately under
the protection of the duke of Argyle, who is a mighty prince in
this part of Scotland. The peasants live in wretched cabins, and
seem very poor; but the gentlemen are tolerably well lodged, and
so loving to strangers, that a man runs some risque of his life
from their hospitality -- It must be observed that the poor
Highlanders are now seen to disadvantage. They have been not only
disarmed by act of parliament, but also deprived of their ancient
garb, which was both graceful and convenient; and what is a
greater hardship still, they are compelled to wear breeches; a
restraint which they cannot bear with any degree of patience:
indeed, the majority wear them, not in the proper place, but on
poles or long staves over their shoulders -- They are even debarred
the use of their striped stuff called Tartane, which was their
own manufacture, prized by them above all the velvets, brocades,
and tissues of Europe and Asia. They now lounge along in loose
great coats, of coarse russet, equally mean and cumbersome, and
betray manifest marks of dejection -- Certain it is, the government
could not have taken a more effectual method to break their
national spirit.

We have had princely sport in hunting the stag on these mountains.
These are the lonely hills of Morven, where Fingal and his heroes
enjoyed the same pastime; I feel an enthusiastic pleasure when I
survey the brown heath that Ossian wont to tread; and hear the
wind whistle through the bending grass -- When I enter our
landlord's hall, I look for the suspended harp of that divine
bard, and listen in hopes of hearing the aerial sound of his
respected spirit -- The poems of Ossian are in every mouth -- A
famous antiquarian of this country, the laird of Macfarlane, at
whose house we dined a few days ago, can repeat them all in the
original Gallick, which has a great affinity to the Welch, not
only in the general sound, but also in a great number of radical
words; and I make no doubt that they are both sprung from the
same origin. I was not a little surprised, when asking a
Highlander one day, if he knew where we should find any game? he
replied, 'hu niel Sassenagh', which signifies no English: the
very same answer I should have received from a Welchman, and
almost in the same words. The Highlanders have no other name for
the people of the Low-country, but Sassenagh, or Saxons; a strong
presumption, that the Lowland Scots and the English are derived
from the same stock -- The peasants of these hills strongly
resemble those of Wales in their looks, their manners, and
habitations; every thing I see , and hear, and feel, seems Welch --
The mountains, vales, and streams; the air and climate; the
beef, mutton, and game, are all Welch -- It must be owned, however,
that this people are better Provided than we in some articles --
They have plenty of red deer and roebuck, which are fat and
delicious at this season of the year. Their sea teems with amazing
quantities of the finest fish in the world. and they find means
to procure very good claret at a very small expence.

Our landlord is a man of consequence in this part of the country;
a cadet from the family of Argyle and hereditary captain of one
of his castles -- His name, in plain English, is Dougal Campbell;
but as there is a great number of the same appellation, they are
distinguished (like the Welch) by patronimics; and as I have
known an antient Briton called Madoc ap-Morgan ap-Jenkin, ap-Jones,
our Highland chief designs himself Dou'l Mac-amish mac-'oul ichian,
signifying Dougal, the son of James, the son of
Dougal, the son of John. He has travelled in the course of his
education, and is disposed to make certain alterations in his
domestic oeconomy; but he finds it impossible to abolish the
ancient customs of the family; some of which are ludicrous
enough -- His piper for example, who is an hereditary officer of
the household, will not part with the least particle of his
privileges. He has a right to wear the kilt, or ancient Highland
dress, with the purse, pistol, and durk -- a broad yellow ribbon,
fixed to the chanter-pipe, is thrown over his shoulder, and
trails along the ground, while he performs the function of his
minstrelsy; and this, I suppose, is analogous to the pennon or
flag which was formerly carried before every knight in battle. --
He plays before the laird every Sunday in his way to the kirk,
which he circles three times, performing the family march which
implies defiance to all the enemies of the clan; and every
morning he plays a full hour by the clock, in the great hall,
marching backwards and forwards all the time, with a solemn pace,
attended by the laird's kinsmen, who seem much delighted with the
music -- In this exercise, he indulges them with a variety of
pibrochs or airs, suited to the different passions, which he
would either excite or assuage.

Mr Campbell himself, who performs very well on the violin, has an
invincible antipathy to the sound of the Highland bagpipe, which
sings in the nose with a most alarming twang, and, indeed, is
quite intolerable to ears of common sensibility, when aggravated
by the echo of a vaulted hall -- He therefore begged the piper
would have some mercy upon him, and dispense with this part of
the morning service -- A consultation of the clan being held on
this occasion, it was unanimously agreed, that the laird's
request could not be granted without a dangerous encroachment
upon the customs of the family -- The piper declared, he could not
give up for a moment the privilege he derived from his ancestors;
nor would the laird's relations forego an entertainment which
they valued above all others -- There was no remedy; Mr Campbell,
being obliged to acquiesce, is fain to stop his ears with cotton;
to fortify his head with three or four night-caps and every
morning retire into the penetralia of his habitation, in order to
avoid this diurnal annoyance. When the music ceases, he produces
himself at an open window that looks into the courtyard, which is
by this time filled with a crowd of his vassals and dependents,
who worship his first appearance, by uncovering their heads, and
bowing to the earth with the most humble prostration. As all
these people have something to communicate in the way of
proposal, complaint, or petition, they wait patiently till the
laird comes forth, and, following him in his walks, are favoured
each with a short audience in his turn. Two days ago, he
dispatched above an hundred different sollicitors, in walking
with us to the house of a neighbouring gentleman, where we dined
by invitation. Our landlord's housekeeping is equally rough and
hospitable, and savours much of the simplicity of ancient times:
the great hall, paved with flat stones, is about forty-five feet
by twenty-two, and serves not only for a dining-room, but also
for a bedchamber, to gentlemen-dependents and hangers-on of the
family. At night, half a dozen occasional beds are ranged on each
side along the wall. These are made of fresh heath, pulled up by
the roots, and disposed in such a manner as to make a very
agreeable couch, where they lie, without any other covering than
the plaid -- My uncle and I were indulged with separate chambers
and down beds which we begged to exchange for a layer of heath;
and indeed I never slept so much to my satisfaction. It was not
only soft and elastic, but the plant, being in flower, diffused
an agreeable fragrance, which is wonderfully refreshing and
restorative.

Yesterday we were invited to the funeral of an old lady, the
grandmother of a gentleman in this neighbourhood, and found
ourselves in the midst of fifty people, who were regaled with a
sumptuous feast, accompanied by the music of a dozen pipers. In
short, this meeting had all the air of a grand festival; and the
guests did such honour to the entertainment, that many of them
could not stand when we were reminded of the business on which
we had met. The company forthwith taking horse, rode in a very
irregular cavalcade to the place of interment, a church, at the
distance of two long miles from the castle. On our arrival,
however, we found we had committed a small oversight, in leaving
the corpse behind; so we were obliged to wheel about, and met the
old gentlewoman half way, being carried upon poles by the nearest
relations of her family, and attended by the coronach, composed
of a multitude of old hags, who tore their hair, beat their
breasts, and howled most hideously. At the grave, the orator, or
senachie, pronounced the panegyric of the defunct, every period
being confirmed by a yell of the coronach. The body was committed
to the earth, the pipers playing a pibroch all the time; and all
the company standing uncovered. The ceremony was closed with the
discharge of pistols; then we returned to the castle, resumed the
bottle, and by midnight there was not a sober person in the
family, the females excepted. The 'squire and I were, with some
difficulty, permitted to retire with our landlord in the evening;
but our entertainer was a little chagrined at our retreat; and
afterwards seemed to think it a disparagement to his family, that
not above a hundred gallons of whisky had been drunk upon such a
solemn occasion. This morning we got up by four, to hunt the
roebuck, and, in half an hour, found breakfast ready served in
the hall. The hunters consisted of Sir George Colquhoun and me,
as strangers (my uncle not chusing to be of the party), of the
laird in person, the laird's brother, the laird's brother's son,
the laird's sister's son, the laird's father's brother's son, and
all their foster brothers, who are counted parcel of the family:
but we were attended by an infinite number of Gaelly's, or ragged
Highlanders without shoes or stockings.

The following articles formed our morning's repast: one kit of
boiled eggs; a second, full of butter; a third full of cream; an
entire cheese, made of goat's milk; a large earthen pot full of
honey; the best part of a ham; a cold venison pasty; a bushel of
oat meal, made in thin cakes and bannocks, with a small wheaten
loaf in the middle for the strangers; a large stone bottle full
of whisky, another of brandy, and a kilderkin of ale. There was
a ladle chained to the cream kit, with curious wooden bickers to
be filled from this reservoir. The spirits were drank out of a
silver quaff, and the ale out of hems: great justice was done to
the collation by the guest in general; one of them in particular
ate above two dozen of hard eggs, with a proportionable quantity
of bread, butter, and honey; nor was one drop of liquor left upon
the board. Finally, a large roll of tobacco was presented by way
of desert, and every individual took a comfortable quid, to
prevent the bad effects of the morning air. We had a fine chace
over the mountains, after a roebuck, which we killed, and I got
home time enough to drink tea with Mrs Campbell and our 'squire.
To-morrow we shall set out on our return for Cameron. We propose
to cross the Frith of Clyde, and take the towns of Greenock and
Port-Glasgow in our way. This circuit being finished, we shall
turn our faces to the south, and follow the sun with augmented
velocity, in order to enjoy the rest of the autumn in England,
where Boreas is not quite so biting as he begins already to be on
the tops of these northern hills. But our progress from place to
place shall continue to be specified in these detached journals of

Yours always,
J. MELFORD
ARGYLSHIRE, Sept. 3.



To Dr LEWIS.

DEAR DICK,

About a fortnight is now elapsed, since we left the capital of
Scotland, directing our course towards Stirling, where we lay. The
castle of this place is such another as that of Edinburgh, and
affords a surprising prospect of the windings of the river Forth,
which are so extraordinary, that the distance from hence to Alloa
by land, is but forty miles, and by water it is twenty-four.
Alloa is a neat thriving town, that depends in a great measure on
the commerce of Glasgow, the merchants of which send hither
tobacco and other articles, to be deposited in warehouses for
exportation from the Frith of Forth. In our way hither we visited
a flourishing iron-work, where, instead of burning wood, they use
coal, which they have the art of clearing in such a manner as
frees it from the sulphur, that would otherwise render the metal
too brittle for working. Excellent coal is found in almost every
part of Scotland.

The soil of this district produces scarce any other grain but
oats, lid barley; perhaps because it is poorly cultivated, and
almost altogether uninclosed. The few inclosures they have
consist of paultry walls of loose stones gathered from the
fields, which indeed they cover, as if they had been scattered on
purpose. When I expressed my surprize that the peasants did not
disencumber their grounds of these stones; a gentleman, well
acquainted with the theory as well as practice of farming,
assured me that the stones, far from being prejudicial, were
serviceable to the crop. This philosopher had ordered a field of
his own to be cleared, manured and sown with barley, and the
produce was more scanty than before. He caused the stones to be
replaced, and next year the crop was as good as ever. The stones
were removed a second time, and the harvest failed; they were
again brought back, and the ground retrieved its fertility. The
same experiment has been tried in different parts of Scotland
with the same success--Astonished at this information, I desired
to know in what manner he accounted for this strange phenomenon;
and he said there were three ways in which the stones might be
serviceable. They might possibly restrain an excess in the
perspiration of the earth, analogous to colliquative sweats, by
which the human body is sometimes wasted and consumed. They might
act as so many fences to protect the tender blade from the
piercing winds of the spring; or, by multiplying the reflexion of
the sun, they might increase the warmth, so as to mitigate the
natural chilness of the soil and climate -- But, surely this
excessive perspiration might be more effectually checked by
different kinds of manure, such as ashes, lime, chalk, or marl,
of which last it seems there are many pits in this kingdom: as
for the warmth, it would be much more equally obtained by
inclosures; the cultivation would require less labour; and the
ploughs, harrows, and horses, would not suffer half the damage
which they now sustain.

These north-western parts are by no means fertile in corn. The
ground is naturally barren and moorish. The peasants are poorly
lodged, meagre in their looks, mean in their apparel, and
remarkably dirty. This last reproach they might easily wash off,
by means of those lakes, rivers, and rivulets of pure water, with
which they are so liberally supplied by nature. Agriculture
cannot be expected to flourish where the farms are small, the
leases short, and the husbandman begins upon a rack rent, without
a sufficient stock to answer the purposes of improvement. The
granaries of Scotland are the banks of the Tweed, the counties of
East and Mid-Lothian, the Carse of Gowrie, in Perthshire, equal
in fertility to any part of England, and some tracts in
Aberdeenshire and Murray, where I am told the harvest is more
early than in Northumberland, although they lie above two degrees
farther north. I have a strong curiosity to visit many places
beyond the Forth and the Tay, such as Perth, Dundee, Montrose,
and Aberdeen, which are towns equally elegant and thriving; but
the season is too far advanced to admit of this addition to my
original plan.

I am so far happy as to have seen Glasgow, which, to the best of
my recollection and judgment, is one of the prettiest towns in
Europe; and, without all doubt, it is one of the most flourishing
in Great Britain. In short, it is a perfect bee-hive in point of
industry. It stands partly on a gentle declivity; but the
greatest part of it is in a plain, watered by the river Clyde.
The streets are straight, open, airy, and well paved; and the
houses lofty and well built of hewn stone. At the upper end of
the town, there is a venerable cathedral, that may be compared
with York-minster or West-minster; and, about the middle of the
descent from this to the Cross, is the college, a respectable
pile of building, with all manner of accommodation for the
professors and students, including an elegant library, and a
observatory well provided with astronomical instruments. The
number of inhabitants is said to amount to thirty thousand; and
marks of opulence and independency appear in every quarter of
this commercial city, which, however, is not without its
inconveniences and defects. The water of their public pumps is
generally hard and brackish, an imperfection the loss excusable,
as the river Clyde runs by their doors, in the lower part of the
town; and there are rivulets and springs above the cathedral,
sufficient to fill a large reservoir with excellent water, which
might be thence distributed to all the different parts of the
city. It is of more consequence to consult the health of the
inhabitants in this article than to employ so much attention in
beautifying their town with new streets, squares, and churches.
Another defect, not so easily remedied, is the shallowness of the
river, which will not float vessels of any burthen within ten or
twelve miles of the city; so that the merchants are obliged to
load and unload their ships at Greenock and Port-Glasgow,
situated about fourteen miles nearer the mouth of the Frith,
where it is about two miles broad.

The people of Glasgow have a noble spirit of enterprise -- Mr
Moore, a surgeon, to whom I was recommended from Edinburgh,
introduced me to all the principal merchants of the place. Here I
became acquainted with Mr Cochran, who may be stiled one of the
sages of this kingdom. He was first magistrate at the time of the
last rebellion. I sat as member when he was examined in the house
of commons, upon which occasion Mr P-- observed he had never
heard such a sensible evidence given at that bar. I was also
introduced to Dr John Gordon, a patriot of a truly Roman spirit,
who is the father of the linen manufacture in this place, and was
the great promoter of the city workhouse, infirmary, and other
works of public utility. Had he lived in ancient Rome, he would
have been honoured with a statue at the public expence. I
moreover conversed with one Mr G--ssf--d, whom I take to be one
of the greatest merchants in Europe. In the last war, he is said
to have had at one time five and twenty ships with their cargoes,
his own property, and to have traded for above half a million
sterling a-year. The last war was a fortunate period for the
commerce of Glasgow -- The merchants, considering that their ships
bound for America, launching out at once into the Atlantic by the
north of Ireland, pursued a track very little frequented by
privateers, resolved to insure one another, and saved a very
considerable sum by this resolution, as few or none of their
ships were taken -- You must know I have a sort of national
attachment to this part of Scotland -- The great church dedicated
to St Mongah, the river Clyde, and other particulars that smack
of our Welch language and customs, contribute to flatter me with
the notion, that these people are the descendants of the Britons,
who once possessed this country. Without all question, this was a
Cumbrian kingdom: its capital was Dumbarton (a corruption of
Dunbritton) which still exists as a royal borough, at the influx
of the Clyde and Leven, ten miles below Glasgow. The same
neighbourhood gave birth to St Patrick, the apostle of Ireland,
at a place where there is still a church and village, which
retain his name. Hard by are some vestiges of the famous Roman
wall, built in the reign of Antonine, from the Clyde to the
Forth, and fortified with castles, to restrain the incursions of
the Scots or Caledonians, who inhabited the West-Highlands. In a
line parallel to this wall, the merchants of Glasgow have
determined to make a navigable canal betwixt the two Firths which
will be of incredible advantage to their commerce, in
transporting merchandize from one side of the island to the
other.

From Glasgow we travelled along the Clyde, which is a delightful
stream, adorned on both sides with villas, towns, and villages.
Here is no want of groves, and meadows, and corn-fields
interspersed; but on this side of Glasgow, there is little other
grain than oats and barley; the first are much better, the last
much worse, than those of the same species in England. I wonder,
there is so little rye, which is a grain that will thrive in
almost any soil; and it is still more surprising, that the
cultivation of potatoes should be so much neglected in the
Highlands, where the poor people have not meal enough to supply
them with bread through the winter. On the other side of the
river are the towns of Paisley and Renfrew. The first, from an
inconsiderable village, is become one of the most flourishing
places of the kingdom, enriched by the linen, cambrick, flowered
lawn, and silk manufactures. It was formerly noted for a rich
monastery of the monks of Clugny, who wrote the famous Scoti-Chronicon,
called The Black Book of Paisley. The old abbey still
remains, converted into a dwelling-house, belonging to the earl
of Dundonald. Renfrew is a pretty town, on the banks of Clyde,
capital of the shire, which was heretofore the patrimony of the
Stuart family, and gave the title of baron to the king's eldest
son, which is still assumed by the prince of Wales.

The Clyde we left a little on our left-hand at Dunbritton, where
it widens into an aestuary or frith, being augmented by the
influx of the Leven. On this spot stands the castle formerly
called Alcluyd, washed, by these two rivers on all sides, except
a narrow isthmus, which at every spring-tide is overflowed. The
whole is a great curiosity, from the quality and form of the
rock, as well as from the nature of its situation -- We now crossed
the water of Leven, which, though nothing near so considerable as
the Clyde, is much more transparent, pastoral, and delightful.
This charming stream is the outlet of Lough-Lomond, and through a
tract of four miles pursues its winding course, murmuring over a
bed of pebbles, till it joins the Frith at Dunbritton. A very
little above its source, on the lake, stands the house of
Cameron, belonging to Mr Smollett, so embosomed in an oak wood,
that we did not see it till we were within fifty yards of the
door. I have seen the Lago di Garda, Albano, De Vico, Bolsena,
and Geneva, and, upon my honour, I prefer Lough-Lomond to them
all, a preference which is certainly owing to the verdant islands
that seem to float upon its surface, affording the most
inchanting objects of repose to the excursive view. Nor are the
banks destitute of beauties, which even partake of the sublime.
On this side they display a sweet variety of woodland, cornfield,
and pasture, with several agreeable villas emerging as it were
out of the lake, till, at some distance, the prospect terminates
in huge mountains covered with heath, which being in the bloom,
affords a very rich covering of purple. Every thing here is
romantic beyond imagination. This country is justly stiled the
Arcadia of Scotland; and I don't doubt but it may vie with
Arcadia in every thing but climate. -- I am sure it excels it in
verdure, wood, and water. -- What say you to a natural bason of
pure water, near thirty miles long, and in some places seven
miles broad, and in many above a hundred fathom deep, having four
and twenty habitable islands, some of them stocked with deer, and
all of them covered with wood; containing immense quantities of
delicious fish, salmon, pike, trout, perch, flounders, eels, and
powans, the last a delicate kind of fresh-water herring peculiar
to this lake; and finally communicating with the sea, by sending
off the Leven, through which all those species (except the powan)
make their exit and entrance occasionally?

Inclosed I send you the copy of a little ode to this river, by Dr
Smollett, who was born on the banks of it, within two miles of
the place where I am now writing. -- It is at least picturesque and
accurately descriptive, if it has no other merit. -- There is an
idea of truth in an agreeable landscape taken from nature, which
pleases me more than the gayest fiction which the most luxuriant
fancy can display.

I have other remarks to make; but as my paper is full, I must
reserve them till the next occasion. I shall only observe at
present, that I am determined to penetrate at least forty miles
into the Highlands, which now appear like a vast fantastic vision
in the clouds, inviting the approach of

Yours always,
MATT. BRAMBLE
CAMERON, Aug. 28.

ODE TO LEVEN-WATER

On Leven's banks, while free to rove,
And tune the rural pipe to love;
I envied not the happiest swain
That ever trod th' Arcadian plain.

Pure stream! in whose transparent wave
My youthful limbs I wont to lave;
No torrents stain thy limpid source;
No rocks impede thy dimpling course,
That sweetly warbles o'er its bed,
With white, round, polish'd pebbles spread;
While, lightly pois'd, the scaly brood
In myriads cleave thy crystal flood;
The springing trout in speckled pride;
The salmon, monarch of the tide;
The ruthless pike, intent on war;
The silver eel, and motled par.*

Devolving from thy parent lake,
A charming maze thy waters make,
By bow'rs of birch, and groves of pine,
And hedges flow'r'd with eglantine.

Still on thy banks so gayly green,
May num'rous herds and flocks be seen,
And lasses chanting o'er the pail,
And shepherds piping in the dale,
And ancient faith that knows no guile,
And industry imbrown'd with toil,
And hearts resolv'd, and hands prepar'd,
The blessings they enjoy to guard.

* The par is a small fish, not unlike the smelt, which it rivals
in delicacy and flavour.



To Dr LEWIS.

DEAR DOCTOR,

If I was disposed to be critical, I should say this house of
Cameron is too near the lake, which approaches, on one side, to
within six or seven yards of the window. It might have been
placed in a higher site, which would have afforded a more
extensive prospect and a drier atmosphere; but this imperfection
is not chargeable on the present proprietor, who purchased it
ready built, rather than be at the trouble of repairing his own
family-house of Bonhill, which stands two miles from hence on the
Leven, so surrounded with plantation, that it used to be known by
the name of the Mavis (or thrush) Nest. Above that house is a
romantic glen or clift of a mountain, covered with hanging woods
having at bottom a stream of fine water that forms a number of
cascades in its descent to join the Leven; so that the scene is
quite enchanting. A captain of a man of war, who had made the
circuit of the globe with Mr Anson, being conducted to this glen,
exclaimed, 'Juan Fernandez, by God!'

Indeed, this country would be a perfect paradise, if it was not,
like Wales, cursed with a weeping climate, owing to the same
cause in both, the neighbourhood of high mountains, and a
westerly situation, exposed to the vapours of the Atlantic ocean.
This air, however, notwithstanding its humidity, is so healthy,
that the natives are scarce ever visited by any other disease
than the smallpox, and certain cutaneous evils, which are the
effects of dirty living, the great and general reproach of the
commonalty of this kingdom. Here are a great many living
monuments of longaevity; and among the rest a person, whom I
treat with singular respect, as a venerable druid, who has lived
near ninety years, without pain or sickness, among oaks of his
own planting. -- He was once proprietor of these lands; but being
of a projecting spirit, some of his schemes miscarried, and he
was obliged to part with his possession, which hath shifted hands
two or three times since that period; but every succeeding
proprietor hath done every thing in his power, to make his old
age easy and comfortable. He has a sufficiency to procure the
necessaries of life; and he and his old woman reside in a small
convenient farm-house, having a little garden which he cultivates
with his own hands. This ancient couple live in great health,
peace, and harmony, and, knowing no wants, enjoy the perfection
of content. Mr Smollet calls him the admiral, because he insists
upon steering his pleasure-boat upon the lake; and he spends most
of his time in ranging through the woods, which he declares he
enjoys as much as if they were still his own property -- I asked
him the other day, if he was never sick, and he answered, Yes;
he had a slight fever the year before the union. If he was not
deaf, I should take much pleasure in his conversation; for he is
very intelligent, and his memory is surprisingly retentive -- These
are the happy effects of temperance, exercise, and good nature --
Notwithstanding all his innocence, however, he was the cause of
great perturbation to my man Clinker, whose natural superstition
has been much injured, by the histories of witches, fairies,
ghosts, and goblins, which he has heard in this country -- On the
evening after our arrival, Humphry strolled into the wood, in the
course of his meditation, and all at once the admiral stood
before him, under the shadow of a spreading oak. Though the
fellow is far from being timorous in cases that are not supposed
preternatural, he could not stand the sight of this apparition,
but ran into the kitchen, with his hair standing on end, staring
wildly, and deprived of utterance. Mrs Jenkins, seeing him in
this condition, screamed aloud, 'Lord have mercy upon us, he has
seen something!' Mrs Tabitha was alarmed, and the whole house in
confusion. When he was recruited with a dram, I desired him to
explain the meaning of all this agitation; and, with some
reluctance, he owned he had seen a spirit, in the shape of an old
man with a white beard, a black cap, and a plaid night-gown. He
was undeceived by the admiral in person, who, coming in at this
juncture, appeared to be a creature of real flesh and blood.

Do you know how we fare in this Scottish paradise? We make free
with our landlord's mutton, which is excellent, his poultry-yard,
his garden, his dairy, and his cellar, which are all well stored.
We have delicious salmon, pike, trout, perch, par, &c. at the
door, for the taking. The Frith of Clyde, on the other side of
the hill, supplies us with mullet, red and grey, cod, mackarel,
whiting, and a variety of sea-fish, including the finest fresh
herrings I ever tasted. We have sweet, juicy beef, and tolerable
veal, with delicate bread
from the little town of Dunbritton; and plenty of partridge,
growse, heath cock, and other game in presents.

We have been visited by all the gentlemen in the neighbourhood,
and they have entertained us at their houses, not barely with
hospitality, but with such marks of cordial affection, as one
would wish to find among near relations, after an absence of many
years.

I told you, in my last, I had projected an excursion to the
Highlands, which project I have now happily executed, under the
auspices of Sir George Colquhoun, a colonel in the Dutch service,
who offered himself as our conductor on this occasion. Leaving
our women at Cameron, to the care and inspection of Lady H-- C--,
we set out on horseback for Inverary, the county town of Argyle,
and dined on the road with the Laird of Macfarlane, the greatest
genealogist I ever knew in any country, and perfectly acquainted
with all the antiquities of Scotland.

The Duke of Argyle has an old castle in Inverary, where he
resides when he is in Scotland; and hard by is the shell of a
noble Gothic palace, built by the last duke, which, when
finished, will be a great ornament to this part of the Highlands.
As for Inverary, it is a place of very little importance.

This country is amazingly wild, especially towards the mountains,
which are heaped upon the backs of one another, making a most
stupendous appearance of savage nature, with hardly any signs of
cultivation, or even of population. All is sublimity, silence,
and solitude. The people live together in glens or bottoms, where
they are sheltered from the cold and storms of winter: but there
is a margin of plain ground spread along the sea side, which is
well inhabited and improved by the arts of husbandry; and this I
take to be one of the most agreeable tracts of the whole island;
the sea not only keeps it warm, and supplies it with fish, but
affords one of the most ravishing prospects in the whole world; I
mean the appearance of the Hebrides, or Western Islands to the
number of three hundred, scattered as far as the eye can reach,
in the most agreeable confusion. As the soil and climate of the
Highlands are but ill adapted to the cultivation of corn, the
people apply themselves chiefly to the breeding and feeding of
black cattle, which turn to good account. Those animals run wild
all the winter, without any shelter or subsistence, but what they
can find among the heath. When the snow lies so deep and hard,
that they cannot penetrate to the roots of the grass, they make a
diurnal progress, guided by a sure instinct, to the seaside at
low water, where they feed on the alga marina, and other plants
that grow upon the beach.

Perhaps this branch of husbandry, which required very little
attendance and labour, is one of the principal causes of that
idleness and want of industry, which distinguishes these
mountaineers in their own country. When they come forth into the
world, they become as diligent and alert as any people upon
earth. They are undoubtedly a very distinct species from their
fellow subjects of the Lowlands, against whom they indulge an
ancient spirit of animosity; and this difference is very
discernible even among persons of family and education. The
Lowlanders are generally cool and circumspect, the Highlanders
fiery and ferocious:' but this violence of their passions serves
only to inflame the zeal of their devotion to strangers, which is
truly enthusiastic.

We proceeded about twenty miles beyond Inverary, to the house of
a gentleman, a friend of our conductor, where we stayed a few
days, and were feasted in such a manner, that I began to dread
the consequence to my constitution.

Notwithstanding the solitude that prevails among these mountains,
there is no want of people in the Highlands. I am credibly
informed that the duke of Argyle can assemble five thousand men
in arms, of his own clan and surname, which is Campbell; and
there is besides a tribe of the same appellation, whose chief' is
the Earl of Breadalbine. The Macdonalds are as numerous, and
remarkably warlike: the Camerons, M'Leods, Frasers, Grants,
M'Kenzies, M'Kays, M'Phersons, M'Intoshes, are powerful clans; so
that if all the Highlanders, including the inhabitants of the
Isles, were united, they could bring into the field an army of
forty thousand fighting men, capable of undertaking the most
dangerous enterprize. We have lived to see four thousand of them,
without discipline, throw the whole kingdom of Great Britain into
confusion. They attacked and defeated two armies of regular
troops accustomed to service. They penetrated into the centre of
England; and afterwards marched back with deliberation, in the
face of two other armies, through an enemy's country, where every
precaution was taken to cut off their retreat. I know not any
other people in Europe, who, without the use or knowledge of
arms, will attack regular forces sword in hand, if their chief
will head them in battle. When disciplined, they cannot fail of
being excellent soldiers. They do not walk like the generality of
mankind, but trot and bounce like deer, as if they moved upon
springs. They greatly excel the Lowlanders in all the exercises
that require agility; they are incredibly abstemious, and patient
of hunger and fatigue, -- so steeled against the weather, that in
travelling, even when the ground is covered with snow, they never
look for a house, or any other shelter but their plaid, in which
they wrap themselves up, and go to sleep under the cope of
heaven. Such people, in quality of soldiers, must be invincible,
when the business is to perform quick marches in a difficult
country, to strike sudden strokes, beat up the enemy's quarters,
harrass their cavalry, and perform expeditions without the
formality of magazines, baggage, forage, and artillery. The
chieftainship of the Highlanders is a very dangerous influence
operating at the extremity of the island, where the eyes and
hands of government cannot be supposed to see [and] act with
precision and vigour. In order to break the force of clanship,
administration has always practised the political maxim, Divide
et impera. The legislature hath not only disarmed these
mountaineers, but also deprived them of their antient garb, which
contributed in a great measure to keep up their military spirit;
and their slavish tenures are all dissolved by act of parliament;
so that they are at present as free and independent of their
chiefs, as the law can make them: but the original attachment
still remains, and is founded on something prior to the feudal
system, about which the writers of this age have made such a
pother, as if it was a new discovery, like the Copernican system.
Every peculiarity of policy, custom, and even temperament, is
affectedly traced to this origin, as if the feudal constitution
had not been common to almost all the natives of Europe. For my
part, I expect to see the use of trunk-hose and buttered ale
ascribed to the influence of the feudal system. The connection
between the clans and their chiefs is, without all doubt,
patriarchal. It is founded on hereditary regard and affection,
cherished through a long succession of ages. The clan consider
the chief as their father, they bear his name, they believe
themselves descended from his family, and they obey him as their
lord, with all the ardour of filial love and veneration; while
he, on his part, exerts a paternal authority, commanding,
chastising, rewarding, protecting, and maintaining them as his
own children. If the legislature would entirely destroy this
connection, it must compel the Highlanders to change their
habitation and their names. Even this experiment has been
formerly tried without success -- In the reign of James VI a battle
was fought within a few short miles of this place, between two
clans, the M'Gregors and the Colquhouns, in which the latter were
defeated: the Laird of M'Gregor made such a barbarous use of his
victory, that he was forfeited and outlawed by act of parliament:
his lands were given to the family of Montrose, and his clan were
obliged to change their name. They obeyed so far, as to call
themselves severally Campbell, Graham, or Drummond, the surnames
of the families of Argyle, Montrose, and Perth, that they might
enjoy the protection of those houses; but they still added
M'Gregor to their new appellation; and as their chief was
deprived of his estate, they robbed and plundered for his
subsistence. -- Mr Cameron of Lochiel, the chief of that clan,
whose father was attainted for having been concerned in the last
rebellion, returning from France in obedience to a proclamation
and act of parliament, passed at the beginning of the late war,
payed a visit to his own country, and hired a farm in the
neighbourhood of his father's house, which had been burnt to the
ground. The clan, though ruined and scattered, no sooner heard of
his arrival than they flocked to him from all quarters, to
welcome his return, and in a few days stocked his farm with seven
hundred black cattle, which they had saved in the general wreck
of their affairs: but their beloved chief, who was a promising
youth, did not live to enjoy the fruits of their fidelity and
attachment.

The most effectual method I know to weaken, and at length destroy
this influence, is to employ the commonalty in such a manner as
to give them a taste of property and independence. In vain the
government grants them advantageous leases on the forfeited
estates, if they have no property to prosecute the means of
improvement -- The sea is an inexhaustible fund of riches; but the
fishery cannot be carried on without vessels, casks, salt, lines,
nets, and other tackle. I conversed with a sensible man of this
country, who, from a real spirit of patriotism had set up a
fishery on the coast, and a manufacture of coarse linen, for the
employment of the poor Highlanders. Cod is here in such plenty,
that he told me he had seen several hundred taken on one line, at
one hawl -- It must be observed, however, that the line was of
immense length, and had two thousand hooks, baited with muscles;
but the fish was so superior to the cod caught on the banks of
Newfoundland, that his correspondent at Lisbon sold them
immediately at his own price, although Lent was just over when
they arrived, and the people might be supposed quite cloyed with
this kind of diet -- His linen manufacture was likewise in a
prosperous way, when the late war intervening, all his best hands
were pressed into the service.

It cannot be expected, that the gentlemen of this country should
execute commercial schemes to render their vassals independent;
nor, indeed, are such schemes suited to their way of life and
inclination; but a company of merchants might, with proper
management, turn to good account a fishery established in this
part of Scotland -- Our people have a strange itch to colonize
America, when the uncultivated parts of our own island might be
settled to greater advantage.

After having rambled through the mountains and glens of Argyle,
we visited the adjacent islands of Ila, Jura, Mull, and Icomkill.
In the first, we saw the remains of a castle, built in a lake,
where Macdonald, lord or king of the isles, formerly resided.
Jura is famous for having given birth to one Mackcrain, who lived
one hundred and eighty years in one house, and died in the reign
of Charles the Second. Mull affords several bays, where there is
safe anchorage: in one of which, the Florida, a ship of the
Spanish armada, was blown up by one of Mr Smollett's ancestors --
About forty years ago, John duke of Argyle is said to have
consulted the Spanish registers, by which it appeared, that this
ship had the military chest on board -- He employed experienced
divers to examine the wreck; and they found the hull of the
vessel still entire, but so covered with sand, that they could
not make their way between decks; however, they picked up several
pieces of plate, that were scattered about in the bay, and a
couple of fine brass cannon.

Icolmkill, or Iona, is a small island which St Columba chose for
his habitation -- It was respected for its sanctity, and college or
seminary of ecclesiastics -- Part of its church is still standing,
with the tombs of several Scottish, Irish, and Danish sovereigns,
who were here interred -- These islanders are very bold and
dexterous watermen, consequently the better adapted to the
fishery: in their manners they are less savage and impetuous than
their countrymen on the continent; and they speak the Erse or
Gaelick in its greatest purity.

Having sent round our horses by land, we embarked in the distinct
of Cowal, for Greenock, which is a neat little town, on the other
side of the Frith, with a curious harbour formed by three stone
jetties, carried out a good way into the sea -- Newport-Glasgow is
such another place, about two miles higher up. Both have a face of
business and plenty, and are supported entirely by the shipping
of Glasgow, of which I counted sixty large vessels in these
harbours -- Taking boat again at Newport, we were in less than an
hour landed on the other side, within two short miles of our
head-quarters, where we found our women in good health and
spirits. They had been two days before joined by Mr. Smollett and
his lady, to whom we have such obligations as I cannot mention,
even to you, without blushing.

To-morrow we shall bid adieu to the Scotch Arcadia, and begin our
progress to the southward, taking our way by Lanerk and
Nithsdale, to the west borders of England. I have received so
much advantage and satisfaction from this tour, that if my health
suffers no revolution in the winter, I believe I shall be tempted
to undertake another expedition to the Northern extremity of
Caithness, unencumbered by those impediments which now clog the
heels of,

Yours,
MATT. BRAMBLE
CAMERON, Sept. 6.



To Miss LAETITIA WILLIS, at Gloucester.

MY DEAREST LETTY,

Never did poor prisoner long for deliverance, more than I have
longed for an opportunity to disburthen my cares into your
friendly bosom; and the occasion which now presents itself, is
little less than miraculous -- Honest Saunders Macawly, the
travelling Scotchman, who goes every year to Wales, is now at
Glasgow, buying goods, and coming to pay his respects to our
family, has undertaken to deliver this letter into your own hand --
We have been six weeks in Scotland, and seen the principal towns
of the kingdom, where we have been treated with great civility --
The people are very courteous; and the country being exceedingly
romantic, suits my turn and inclinations -- I contracted some
friendships at Edinburgh, which is a large and lofty city, full
of gay company; and, in particular, commenced an intimate
correspondence with one miss R--t--n, an amiable young lady of my
own age, whose charms seemed to soften, and even to subdue the
stubborn heart of my brother Jery; but he no sooner left the
place than he relapsed into his former insensibility -- I feel,
however, that this indifference is not the family constitution -- I
never admitted but one idea of love, and that has taken such root
in my heart, as to be equally proof against all the pulls of
discretion, and the frosts of neglect.

Dear Letty! I had an alarming adventure at the hunters ball in
Edinburgh -- While I sat discoursing with a friend in a corner, all
at once the very image of Wilson stood before me, dressed exactly
as he was in the character of Aimwell! It was one Mr Gordon, whom
I had not seen before -- Shocked at the sudden apparition, I
fainted away, and threw the whole assembly in confusion -- However,
the cause of my disorder remained a secret to every body but my
brother, who was likewise struck with the resemblance, and
scolded after we came home -- I am very sensible of Jery's
affection, and know he spoke as well with a view to my own
interest and happiness, as in regard to the honour of the family;
but I cannot bear to have my wounds probed severely -- I was not so
much affected by the censure he passed upon my own indiscretion,
as with the reflection he made on the conduct of Wilson. He
observed, that if he was really the gentleman he pretended to be,
and harboured nothing but honourable designs, he would have
vindicated his pretensions in the face of day -- This remark made a
deep impression upon my mind -- I endeavoured to conceal my
thoughts; and this endeavour had a bad effect upon my health and
spirits; so it was thought necessary that I should go to the
Highlands, and drink the goat-milk-whey.

We went accordingly to Lough Lomond, one of the most enchanting
spots in the whole world; and what with this remedy, which I had
every morning fresh from the mountains, and the pure air, and
chearful company, I have recovered my flesh and appetite; though
there is something still at bottom, which it is not in the power
of air, exercise, company, or medicine to remove -- These incidents
would not touch me so nearly, if I had a sensible confidant to
sympathize with my affliction, and comfort me with wholesome
advice -- I have nothing of this kind, except Win Jenkins, who is
really a good body in the main, but very ill qualified for such
an office -- The poor creature is weak in her nerves, as well as in
her understanding; otherwise I might have known the true name and
character of that unfortunate youth -- But why do I call him
unfortunate? perhaps the epithet is more applicable to me for
having listened to the false professions of -- But, hold! I have as
yet no right, and sure I have no inclination to believe any thing
to the prejudice of his honour -- In that reflection I shall still
exert my patience. As for Mrs Jenkins, she herself is really an
object of compassion -- Between vanity, methodism, and love, her
head is almost turned. I should have more regard for her,
however, if she had been more constant in the object of her
affection; but, truly, she aimed at conquest, and flirted at the
same time with my uncle's footman, Humphrey Clinker, who is
really a deserving young man, and one Dutton, my brother's valet
de chambre, a debauched fellow; who, leaving Win in the lurch,
ran away with another man's bride at Berwick.

My dear Willis, I am truly ashamed of my own sex -- We complain of
advantages which the men take of our youth, inexperience,
insensibility, and all that; but I have seen enough to believe,
that our sex in general make it their business to ensnare the
other; and for this purpose, employ arts which are by no means to
be justified -- In point of constancy, they certainly have nothing
to reproach the male part of the creation -- My poor aunt, without
any regard to her years and imperfections, has gone to market
with her charms in every place where she thought she had the
least chance to dispose of her person, which, however, hangs
still heavy on her hands -- I am afraid she has used even religion
as a decoy, though it has not answered her expectation -- She has
been praying, preaching, and catechising among the methodists,
with whom this country abounds; and pretends to have such
manifestations and revelations, as even Clinker himself can
hardly believe, though the poor fellow is half crazy with
enthusiasm. As for Jenkins, she affects to take all her
mistress's reveries for gospel. She has also her heart-heavings
and motions of the spirit; and God forgive me if I think
uncharitably, but all this seems to me to be downright hypocrisy
and deceit -- Perhaps, indeed, the poor girl imposes on herself --
She is generally in a flutter, and is much subject to vapours --
Since we came to Scotland, she has seen apparitions, and pretends
to prophesy -- If I could put faith in all these supernatural
visitations, I should think myself abandoned of grace; for I have
neither seen, heard, nor felt anything of this nature, although I
endeavour to discharge the duties of religion with all the
sincerity, zeal, and devotion, that is in the power of,

Dear Letty,
your ever affectionate,
LYDIA MELFORD
GLASGOW, Sept. 7.

We are so far on our return to Brambleton-hall; and I would fain
hope we shall take Gloucester in our way, in which case I shall
have the inexpressible pleasure of embracing my dear Willis -- Pray
remember me to my worthy governess.



To Mrs MARY JONES, at Brambleton-hall.

DEAR MARY,

Sunders Macully, the Scotchman, who pushes directly for Vails,
has promised to give it you into your own hand, and therefore I
would not miss the opportunity to let you know as I am still in
the land of the living: and yet I have been on the brink of the
other world since I sent you my last letter. -- We went by sea to
another kingdom called Fife, and coming back, had like to have
gone to pot in a storm. -- What between the frite and sickness, I
thought I should have brought my heart up; even Mr Clinker was
not his own man for eight and forty hours after we got ashore. It
was well for some folks that we scaped drownding; for mistress
was very frexious, and seemed but indifferently prepared for a
change; but, thank God, she was soon put in a better frame by the
private exaltations of the reverend Mr Macrocodile. -- We
afterwards churned to Starling and Grascow, which are a kiple of
handsome towns; and then we went to a gentleman's house at Loff-Loming,
which is a wonderful sea of fresh water, with a power of
hylands in the midst on't. -- They say as how it has n'er a bottom,
and was made by a musician and, truly, I believe it; for it is
not in the coarse of nature. -- It has got waves without wind, fish
without fins, and a floating hyland; and one of them is a crutch-yard,
where the dead are buried; and always before the person
dies, a bell rings of itself to give warning.

O Mary! this is the land of congyration -- The bell knolled when we
were there -- I saw lights, and heard lamentations. -- The gentleman,
our landlord, has got another house, which he was fain to quit,
on account of a mischievous ghost, that would not suffer people
to lie in their beds. The fairies dwell in a hole of Kairmann, a
mounting hard by; and they steal away the good women that are in
the straw, if so be as how there a'n't a horshoe nailed to the
door: and I was shewn an ould vitch, called Elspath Ringavey,
with a red petticoat, bleared eyes, and a mould of grey bristles
on her sin. -- That she mought do me no harm, I crossed her hand
with a taster, and bid her tell my fortune; and she told me such
things descriving Mr Clinker to a hair -- but it shall ne'er be
said, that I minchioned a word of the matter. -- As I was troubled
with fits, she advised me to bathe in the loff, which was holy
water; and so I went in the morning to a private place along with
the house-maid, and we bathed in our birth-day soot, after the
fashion of the country; and behold whilst we dabbled in the loff,
sir George Coon started up with a gun; but we clapt our hands to
our faces, and passed by him to the place where we had left our
smocks -- A civil gentleman would have turned his head another
way. -- My comfit is, he new not which was which; and, as the
saying is, all cats in the dark are grey -- Whilst we stayed at
Loff-Loming, he and our two squires went three or four days
churning among the wild men of the mountings; a parcel of
selvidges that lie in caves among
the rocks, devour young children, speak Velch, but the vords are
different. Our ladies would not part with Mr Clinker, because he
is so stout and so pyehouse, that he fears neither man nor
devils, if so be as they don't take him by surprise. -- Indeed, he
was once so flurried by an operition, that he had like to have
sounded. -- He made believe as if it had been the ould edmiral; but
the old edmiral could not have made his air to stand on end,, and
his teeth to shatter; but he said so in prudence, that the ladies
mought not be afear'd. Miss Liddy has been puny, and like to go
into a decline -- I doubt her pore art is too tinder -- but the
got's-fey has set her on her legs again. -- You nows got's-fey is
mother's milk to a Velch woman. As for mistress, blessed be God,
she ails nothing. -- Her stomick is good, and she improves in
grease and godliness; but, for all that, she may have infections
like other people, and I believe, she wouldn't be sorry to be
called your ladyship, whenever sir George thinks proper to ax the
question -- But, for my part, whatever I may see or hear, not a
praticle shall ever pass the lips of,

Dear Molly,
Your loving friend,
WIN. JENKINS
GRASCO, Sept. 7.

Remember me, as usual, to Sall. -- We are now coming home, though
not the nearest road. -- I do suppose, I shall find the kitten a
fine boar at my return.




To Sir WATKIN PHILLIPS, Bart. at Oxon.

DEAR KNIGHT,

Once more I tread upon English ground, which I like not the worse
for the six weeks' ramble I have made among the woods and
mountains of Caledonia; no offence to the land of cakes, where
bannocks grow upon straw. I never saw my uncle in such health and
spirits as he now enjoys. Liddy is perfectly recovered; and Mrs
Tabitha has no reason to complain. Nevertheless, I believe, she
was, till yesterday, inclined to give the whole Scotch nation to
the devil, as a pack of insensible brutes, upon whom her
accomplishments had been displayed in vain. -- At every place where
we halted, did she mount the stage, and flourished her rusty
arms, without being able to make one conquest. One of her last
essays was against the heart of Sir George Colquhoun, with whom
she fought all the weapons more than twice over. -- She was grave
and gay by turns -- she moralized and methodized -- she laughed, and
romped, and danced, and sung, and sighed, and ogled, and lisped,
and fluttered, and flattered -- but all was preaching to the desart.
The baronet, being a well-bred man, carried his civilities as far
as she could in conscience expect, and, if evil tongues are to be
believed, some degrees farther; but he was too much a veteran in
gallantry, as well as in war, to fall into any ambuscade that she
could lay for his affection -- While we were absent in the
Highlands, she practised also upon the laird of Ladrishmore, and
even gave him the rendezvous in the wood of Drumscailloch; but
the laird had such a reverend care of his own reputation, that he
came attended with the parson of the parish, and nothing passed
but spiritual communication. After all these miscarriages, our
aunt suddenly recollected lieutenant Lismahago, whom, ever since
our first arrival at Edinburgh, she seemed to have utterly
forgot; but now she expressed her hopes of seeing him at
Dumfries, according to his promise.

We set out from Glasgow by the way of Lanerk, the county-town of
Clydesdale, in the neighbourhood of which, the whole river Clyde,
rushing down a steep rock, forms a very noble and stupendous
cascade. Next day we were obliged to halt in a small borough,
until the carriage, which had received some damage, should be
repaired; and here we met with an incident which warmly
interested the benevolent spirit of Mr Bramble -- As we stood at
the window of an inn that fronted the public prison, a person
arrived on horseback, genteelly, tho' plainly, dressed in a blue
frock, with his own hair cut short, and a gold-laced hat upon his
head. -- Alighting, and giving his horse to the landlord, he
advanced to an old man who was at work in paving the street, and
accosted him in these words: 'This is hard work for such an old
man as you.' -- So saying, he took the instrument out of his hand,
and began to thump the pavement. -- After a few strokes, 'Have you
never a son (said he) to ease you of this labour?' 'Yes, an
please Your honour (replied the senior), I have three hopeful
lads, but, at
present, they are out of the way.' 'Honour not me (cried the
stranger); but more becomes me to honour your grey hairs. Where
are those sons you talk of?' The ancient paviour said, his eldest
son was a captain in the East Indies; and the youngest had lately
inlisted as a soldier, in hopes of prospering like his brother.
The gentleman desiring to know what was become of the second, he
wiped his eyes, and owned, he had taken upon him his old father's
debts, for which he was now in the prison hard by.

The traveller made three quick steps towards the jail, then
turning short, 'Tell me (said he), has that unnatural captain
sent you nothing to relieve your distress?' 'Call him not
unnatural (replied the other); God's blessing be upon him! he
sent me a great deal of money; but I made a bad use of it; I lost
it by being security for a gentleman that was my landlord, and
was stript of all I had in the world besides.' At that instant a
young man, thrusting out his head and neck between two iron bars
in the prison-window, exclaimed, 'Father! father! if my brother
William is in life, that's he!' 'I am! -- I am! -- (cried the
stranger, clasping the old man in his arms, and shedding a flood
of tears) -- I am your son Willy, sure enough!' Before the father,
who was quite confounded, could make any return to this
tenderness, a decent old woman bolting out from the door of a
poor habitation, cried, 'Where is my bairn? where is my dear
Willy?' -- The captain no sooner beheld her, than he quitted his
father, and ran into her embrace.

I can assure you, my uncle, who saw and heard every thing that
passed, was as much moved as any one of the parties concerned in
this pathetic recognition -- He sobbed, and wept, and clapped his
hands, and hollowed, and finally ran down into the street. By
this time, the captain had retired with his parents, and all the
inhabitants of the place were assembled at the door. -- Mr Bramble,
nevertheless, pressed thro' the crowd, and entering the house,
'Captain (said he), I beg the favour of your acquaintance. I would
have travelled a hundred miles to see this affecting scene; and I
shall think myself happy if you and your parents will dine with
me at the public house.' The captain thanked him for his kind
invitation, which, he said, he would accept with pleasure; but in
the mean time, he could not think of eating or drinking, while
his poor brother was in trouble. He forthwith deposited a sum
equal to the debt in the hands of the magistrate, who ventured to
set his brother at liberty without farther process; and then the
whole family repaired to the inn with my uncle, attended by the
crowd, the individuals of which shook their townsman by the hand,
while he returned their caresses without the least sign of pride
or affectation.

This honest favourite of fortune, whose name was Brown, told my
uncle, that he had been bred a weaver, and, about eighteen years
ago, had, from a spirit of idleness and dissipation, enlisted as
a soldier in the service of the East-India company; that, in the
course of duty, he had the good fortune to attract the notice and
approbation of Lord Clive, who preferred him from one step to
another, till he attained the rank of captain and pay-master to
the regiment, in which capacities he had honestly amassed above
twelve thousand pounds, and, at the peace, resigned his
commission. -- He had sent several remittances to his father, who
received the first only, consisting of one hundred pounds; the
second had fallen into the hands of a bankrupt; and the third had
been consigned to a gentleman of Scotland, who died before it
arrived; so that it still remained to be accounted for by his
executors. He now presented the old man with fifty pounds for his
present occasions, over and above bank notes for one hundred,
which he had deposited for his brother's release. -- He brought
along with him a deed ready executed, by which he settled a
perpetuity of four-score pounds upon his parents, to be inherited
by their other two sons after their decease. -- He promised to
purchase a commission for his youngest brother; to take the other
as his own partner in a manufacture which he intended to set up,
to give employment and bread to the industrious; and to give five
hundred pounds, by way of dower, to his sister, who had married a
farmer in low circumstances. Finally, he gave fifty pounds to the
poor of the town where he was born, and feasted all the
inhabitants without exception.

My uncle was so charmed with the character of captain Brown, that
he drank his health three times successively at dinner -- He said,
he was proud of his acquaintance; that he was an honour to his
country, and had in some measure redeemed human nature from the
reproach of pride, selfishness, and ingratitude. -- For my part, I
was as much pleased with the modesty as with the filial virtue of
this honest soldier, who assumed no merit from his success, and
said very little of his own transactions, though the answers he
made to our inquiries were equally sensible and laconic, Mrs
Tabitha behaved very graciously to him until she understood that
he was going to make a tender of his hand to a person of low
estate, who had been his sweet-heart while he worked as a
journeyman weaver. -- Our aunt was no sooner made acquainted with
this design, than she starched up her behaviour with a double
proportion of reserve; and when the company broke up, she
observed with a toss of her nose, that Brown was a civil fellow
enough, considering the lowness of his original; but that
Fortune, though she had mended his circumstances, was incapable
to raise his ideas, which were still humble and plebeian.

On the day that succeeded this adventure, we went some miles out
of our road to see Drumlanrig, a seat belonging to the duke of
Queensberry, which appears like a magnificent palace erected by
magic, in the midst of a wilderness. -- It is indeed a princely
mansion, with suitable parks and plantations, rendered still more
striking by the nakedness of the surrounding country, which is
one of the wildest tracts in all Scotland. -- This wildness,
however, is different from that of the Highlands; for here the
mountains, instead of heath, are covered with a fine green
swarth, affording pasture to innumerable flocks of sheep. But the
fleeces of this country, called Nithsdale, are not comparable to
the wool of Galloway, which is said to equal that of Salisbury
plain. Having passed the night at the castle of Drumlanrig, by
invitation from the duke himself, who is one of the best men that
ever breathed, we prosecuted our journey to Dumfries, a very
elegant trading town near the borders of England, where we found
plenty of good provision and excellent wine, at very reasonable
prices, and the accommodation as good in all respects as in any
part of South-Britain. If I was confined to Scotland for life, I
would chuse Dumfries as the place of my residence. Here we made
enquiries about captain Lismahago, of whom hearing no tidings, we
proceeded by the Solway Frith, to Carlisle. You must know, that
the Solway sands, upon which travellers pass at low water, are
exceedingly dangerous, because, as the tide makes, they become
quick in different places, and the flood rushes in so
impetuously, that the passengers are often overtaken by the sea
and perish.

In crossing these treacherous Syrtes with a guide, we perceived a
drowned horse, which Humphry Clinker, after due inspection,
declared to be the very identical beast which Mr Lismahago rode
when he parted with us at Feltonbridge in Northumberland. This
information, which seemed to intimate that our friend the
lieutenant had shared the fate of his horse, affected us all, and
above all our aunt Tabitha, who shed salt tears, and obliged
Clinker to pull a few hairs out of the dead horse's tail, to be
worn in a ring as a remembrance of his master: but her grief and
ours was not of long duration; for one of the first persons we
saw in Carlisle, was the lieutenant in propria persona,
bargaining with a horse-dealer for another steed, in the yard of
the inn where we alighted. -- Mrs Bramble was the first that
perceived him, and screamed as if she had seen a ghost; and,
truly, at a proper time and place, he might very well have passed
for an inhabitant of another world; for he was more meagre and
grim than before. -- We received him the more cordially for having
supposed he had been drowned; and he was not deficient in
expressions of satisfaction at this meeting. He told us, he had
enquired for us at Dumfries, and been informed by a travelling
merchant from Glasgow, that we had resolved to return by the way
of Coldstream. He said, that in passing the sands without a
guide, his horse had knocked up, and he himself must have
perished, if he had not been providentially relieved by a return
post-chaise. -- He moreover gave us to understand, that his scheme
of settling in his own country having miscarried, he was so far
on his way to London, with a view to embark for North-America,
where he intended to pass the rest of his days among his old
friends the Miamis, and amuse himself in finishing the education
of the son he had by his beloved Squinkinacoosta.

This project was by no means agreeable to our good aunt, who
expatiated upon the fatigues and dangers that would attend such a
long voyage by sea, and afterwards such a tedious journey by
land -- She enlarged particularly on the risque he would run, with
respect to the concerns of his precious soul, among savages who
had not yet received the glad tidings of salvation; and she
hinted that his abandoning Great-Britain might, perhaps, prove
fatal to the inclinations of some deserving person, whom he was
qualified to make happy for life. My uncle, who is really a Don
Quixote in generosity, understanding that Lismahago's real reason
for leaving Scotland was the impossibility of subsisting in it
with any decency upon the wretched provision of a subaltern's
half-pay, began to be warmly interested on the side of
compassion. -- He thought it very hard, that a gentleman who had
served his country with honour, should be driven by necessity to
spend his old age, among the refuse of mankind, in such a remote
part of the world. -- He discoursed with me upon the subject;
observing, that he would willingly offer the lieutenant an asylum
at Brambleton-hall, if he did not foresee that his singularities
and humour of contradiction would render him an intolerable
housemate, though his conversation at some times might be both
instructive and entertaining: but, as there seemed to be
something particular in his attention to Mrs Tabitha, he and I
agreed in opinion, that this intercourse should be encouraged and
improved, if possible, into a matrimonial union; in which case
there would be a comfortable provision for both; and they might
be settled in a house of their own, so that Mr Bramble should
have no more of their company than he desired.

In pursuance of this design, Lismahago has been invited to pass
the winter at Brambleton-hall, as it will be time enough to
execute his American project in the spring. -- He has taken time to
consider of this proposal; mean while, he will keep us company as
far as we travel in the road to Bristol, where he has hopes of
getting a passage for America. I make no doubt but that he will
postpone his voyage, and prosecute his addresses to a happy
consummation; and sure, if it produces any fruit, it must be of a
very peculiar flavour. As the weather continues favourable, I
believe, we shall take the Peak of Derbyshire and Buxton Wells in
our way. -- At any rate, from the first place where we make any
stay, you shall hear again from

Yours always,
J. MELFORD
CARLISLE, Sep. 12.



To Dr LEWIS.

DEAR DOCTOR,

The peasantry of Scotland are certainly on a poor footing all
over the kingdom; and yet they look better, and are better
cloathed than those of the same rank in Burgundy, and many other
places of France and Italy; nay, I will venture to say they are
better fed, notwithstanding the boasted wine of these foreign
countries. The country people of North-Britain live chiefly on
oat-meal, and milk, cheese, butter, and some garden-stuff, with
now and then a pickled-herring, by way of delicacy; but flesh-meat
they seldom or never taste; nor any kind of strong liquor,
except two-penny, at times of uncommon festivity -- Their breakfast
is a kind of hasty pudding, of oat-meal or pease-meal, eaten with
milk. They have commonly pottage for dinner, composed of cale or
cole, leeks, barley or big, and butter; and this is reinforced
with bread and cheese, made of skimmed-milk -- At night they sup on
sowens or flummery of oat-meal -- In a scarcity of oats, they use
the meal of barley and pease, which is both nourishing and
palatable. Some of them have potatoes; and you find parsnips in
every peasant's garden -- They are cloathed with a coarse kind of
russet of their own making, which is both decent and warm -- They
dwell in poor huts, built of loose stones and turf, without any
mortar, having a fireplace or hearth in the middle, generally
made of an old mill-stone, and a hole at top to let out the
smoke.

These people, however, are content, and wonderfully sagacious --
All of them read the Bible, and are even qualified to dispute
upon the articles of their faith; which in those parts I have
seen, is entirely Presbyterian. I am told, that the inhabitants
of Aberdeenshire are still more acute. I once knew a Scotch
gentleman at London, who had declared war against this part of
his countrymen; and swore that the impudence and knavery of the
Scots, in that quarter, had brought a reproach upon the whole
nation.

The river Clyde, above Glasgow, is quite pastoral; and the banks
of it are every where adorned with fine villas. From the sea to
its source, we may reckon the seats of many families of the first
rank, such as the duke of Argyle at Roseneath, the earl of Bute
in the isle of that name, the earl of Glencairn at Finlayston,
lord Blantyre at Areskine, the dutchess of Douglas at Bothwell,
duke Hamilton at Hamilton, the duke of Douglas at Douglas, and
the earl of Hyndford at Carmichael. Hamilton is a noble palace,
magnificently furnished; and hard by is the village of that name,
one of the neatest little towns I have seen in any country. The
old castle of Douglas being burned to the ground by accident, the
late duke resolved, as head of the first family of Scotland, to
have the largest house in the kingdom, and ordered a plan for
this purpose; but there was only one wing of it finished when he
died. It is to be hoped that his nephew, who is now in possession
of his great fortune, will complete the design of his
predecessor -- Clydesdale is in general populous and rich,
containing a great number of gentlemen, who are independent in
their fortune; but it produces more cattle than corn -- This is
also the case with Tweedale, through part of which we passed, and
Nithsdale, which is generally rough, wild, and mountainous -- These
hills are covered with sheep; and this is the small delicious
mutton, so much preferable to that of the London-market. As their
feeding costs so little, the sheep are not killed till five years
old, when their flesh, juices, and flavour are in perfection; but
their fleeces are much damaged by the tar, with which they are
smeared to preserve them from the rot in winter, during which
they run wild night and day, and thousands are lost under huge
wreaths of snow -- 'Tis pity the farmers cannot contrive some means
to shelter this useful animal from the inclemencies of a rigorous
climate, especially from the perpetual rains, which are more
prejudicial than the greatest extremity of cold weather.

On the little river Nid, is situated the castle of Drumlanrig,
one of the noblest seats in Great-Britain, belonging to the duke
of Queensberry; one of those few noblemen whose goodness of heart
does honour to human-nature -- I shall not pretend to enter into a
description of this palace, which is really an instance of the
sublime in magnificence, as well as in situation, and puts one in
mind of the beautiful city of Palmyra, rising like a vision in
the midst of the wilderness. His grace keeps open house, and
lives with great splendour -- He did us the honour to receive us
with great courtesy, and detain'd us all night, together with
above twenty other guests, with all their servants and horses to
a very considerable number -- The dutchess was equally gracious,
and took our ladies under her immediate protection. The longer I
live, I see more reason to believe that prejudices of education
are never wholly eradicated, even when they are discovered to be
erroneous and absurd. Such habits of thinking as interest the
grand passions, cleave to the human heart in such a manner, that
though an effort of reason may force them from their hold for a
moment, this violence no sooner ceases, than they resume their
grasp with an increased elasticity and adhesion.

I am led into this reflection, by what passed at the duke's table
after supper. The conversation turned upon the vulgar notions of
spirits and omens, that prevail among the commonalty of North-Britain,
and all the company agreed, that nothing could be more
ridiculous. One gentleman, however, told a remarkable story of
himself, by way of speculation 'Being on a party of hunting in
the North (said he), I resolved to visit an old friend, whom I
had not seen for twenty years -- So long he had been retired and
sequestered from all his acquaintance, and lived in a moping
melancholy way, much afflicted with lowness of spirits,
occasioned by the death of his wife, whom he had loved with
uncommon affection. As he resided in a remote part of the
country, and we were five gentlemen with as many servants, we
carried some provision with us from the next market town, lest we
should find him unprepared for our reception. The roads being
bad, we did not arrive at the house till two o'clock in the
afternoon; and were agreeably surprised to find a very good
dinner ready in the kitchen, and the cloth laid with six covers.
My friend himself appeared in his best apparel at the gate, and
received us with open arms, telling me he had been expecting us
these two hours. Astonished at this declaration, I asked who had
given him intelligence of our coming? and he smiled without
making any other reply. However, presuming upon our former
intimacy, I afterwards insisted upon knowing; and he told me,
very gravely, he had seen me in a vision of the second sight --
Nay, he called in the evidence of his steward, who solemnly
declared, that his master had the day before apprised him of my
coming, with four other strangers, and ordered him to provide
accordingly; in consequence of which intimation, he had prepared
the dinner which we were now eating; and laid the covers
according to the number foretold.' The incident we all owned to
be remarkable, and I endeavoured to account for it by natural
means. I observed, that as the gentleman was of a visionary turn,
the casual idea, or remembrance of his old friend, might suggest
those circumstances, which accident had for once realized; but
that in all probability he had seen many visions of the same
kind, which were never verified. None of the company directly
dissented from my opinion; but from the objections that were
hinted, I could plainly perceive that the majority were persuaded
there was something more extraordinary in the case.

Another gentleman of the company, addressing himself to me,
'Without all doubt (said he), a diseased imagination is very apt
to produce visions; but we must find some other method to account
for something of this kind, that happened within these eight days
in my neighbourhood -- A gentleman of a good family, who cannot be
deemed a visionary in any sense of the word, was near his own
gate, in the twilight, visited by his grandfather, who has been
dead these fifteen years -- The spectre was mounted seemingly on
the very horse he used to ride, with an angry and terrible
countenance, and said something, which his grandson, in the
confusion of fear, could not understand. But this was not all -- He
lifted up a huge horse whip, and applied it with great violence
to his back and shoulders, on which I saw the impression with my
own eyes. The apparition was afterwards seen by the sexton of the
parish, hovering about the tomb where his body lies interred; as
the man declared to several persons in the village, before he
knew what had happened to the gentleman -- Nay, he actually came to
me as a justice of the peace, in order to make oath of these
particulars, which, however, I declined administering. As for the
grandson of the defunct, he is a sober, sensible, worldly minded
fellow, too intent upon schemes of interest to give in to
reveries. He would have willingly concealed the affair; but he
bawled out in the first transport of his fear, and, running into
the house, exposed his back and his sconce to the whole family;
so that there was no denying it in the sequel. It is now the
common discourse of the country, that this appearance and
behaviour of the old man's spirit, portends some great calamity
to the family, and the good-woman has actually taken to her bed
in this apprehension.'

Though I did not pretend to explain this mystery, I said, I did
not at all doubt, but it would one day appear to be a deception;
and, in all probability, a scheme executed by some enemy of the
person who had sustained the assault; but still the gentleman
insisted upon the clearness of the evidence, and the concurrence
of testimony, by which two creditable witnesses, without any
communication one with another, affirmed the appearance of the
same man, with whose person they were both well acquainted -- From
Drumlanrig we pursued the course of the Nid to Dumfries, which
stands seven miles above the place where the river falls into the
sea; and is, after Glasgow, the handsomest town I have seen in
Scotland. The inhabitants, indeed, seem to have proposed that city
as their model; not only in beautifying their town and regulating
its police, but, also in prosecuting their schemes of commerce
and manufacture, by which they are grown rich and opulent.

We re-entered England, by the way of Carlisle, where we
accidentally met with our friend Lismahago, whom we had in vain
inquired after at Dumfries and other places -- It would seem that
the captain, like the prophets of old, is but little honoured in
his own country, which he has now renounced for ever -- He gave me
the following particulars of his visit to his native soil -- In his
way to the place of his nativity, he learned that his nephew had
married the daughter of a burgeois, who directed a weaving
manufacture, and had gone into partnership with his father-in-law:
chagrined with this information, he had arrived at the gate
in the twilight, where he heard the sound of treddles in the
great hall, which had exasperated him to such a degree, that he
had like to have lost his senses: while he was thus transported
with indignation, his nephew chanced to come forth, when, being
no longer master of his passion, he cried, 'Degenerate rascal!
you have made my father's house a den of thieves;' and at the
same time chastised him with his horse-whip; then, riding round
the adjoining village, he had visited the burying-ground of his
ancestors by moon-light; and, having paid his respects to their
manes, travelled all night to another part of the country --
Finding the head of the family in such a disgraceful situation,
all his own friends dead or removed from the places of their
former residence, and the expence of living increased to double
of what it had been, when he first left his native country, he
had bid it an eternal adieu, and was determined to seek for
repose among the forests of America.

I was no longer at a loss to account for the apparition, which
had been described at Drumlanrig; and when I repeated the story
to the lieutenant, he was much pleased to think his resentment
had been so much more effectual than he intended; and he owned,
he might at such an hour, and in such an equipage, very well pass
for the ghost of his father, whom he was said greatly to
resemble -- Between friends, I fancy Lismahago will find a retreat
without going so far as the wigwams of the Miamis. My sister
Tabby is making continual advances to him, in the way of
affection; and, if I may trust to appearances, the captain is
disposed to take opportunity by the forelock. For my part, I
intend to encourage this correspondence, and shall be glad to see
them united -- In that case, we shall find a way to settle them
comfortably in our own neighbourhood. I, and my servants, will
get rid of a very troublesome and tyrannic gouvernante; and I
shall have the benefit of Lismahago's conversation, without being
obliged to take more of his company than I desire; for though an
olla is a high-flavoured dish, I could not bear to dine upon it
every day of my life.

I am much pleased with Manchester, which is one of the most
agreeable and flourishing towns in Great-Britain; and I perceive
that this is the place which hath animated the spirit, and
suggested the chief manufactures of Glasgow. We propose to visit
Chatsworth, the Peak, and Buxton, from which last place we shall
proceed directly homewards, though by easy journies. If the
season has been as favourable in Wales as in the North, your
harvest is happily finished; and we have nothing left to think of
but our October, of which let Barns be properly reminded. You
will find me much better in flesh than I was at our parting; and
this short separation has given a new edge to those sentiments of
friendship with which I always have been, and ever shall be,

Yours,
MATT. BRAMBLE
MANCHESTER, Sept. 15.



To Mrs GWILLIM, house-keeper at Brambleton-hall.

MRS GWYLLIM,

It has pleased Providence to bring us safe back to England, and
partake us in many pearls by land and water, in particular the
Devil's Harse a pike, and Hoyden's Hole, which hath got no
bottom; and, as we are drawing huomwards, it may be proper to
uprise you, that Brambleton-hall may be in condition to receive
us, after this long gurney to the islands of Scotland. By the
first of next month you may begin to make constant fires in my
brother's chamber and mine; and burn a fagget every day in the
yellow damask room: have the tester and curtains dusted, and the
featherbed and matrosses well haired, because, perhaps, with the
blissing of haven, they may be yoosed on some occasion. Let the
ould hogsheads be well skewred and seasoned for bear, as Mat is
resolved to have his seller choak fool.

If the house was mine, I would turn over a new leaf -- I don't see
why the sarvants of Wales shouldn't drink fair water, and eat hot
cakes and barley cale, as they do in Scotland, without troubling
the botcher above once a quarter -- I hope you keep accunt of
Roger's purseeding in reverence to the buttermilk. I expect my
dew when I come huom, without baiting an ass, I'll assure you. --
As you must have layed a great many more eggs than would be
eaten, I do suppose there is a power of turks, chickings, and
guzzling about the house; and a brave kergo of cheese ready for
market; and that the owl has been sent to Crickhowel, saving what
the maids spun in the family.

Pray let the whole house and furniture have a thorough cleaning
from top to bottom, for the honour of Wales; and let Roger search
into, and make a general clearance of the slit holes, which the
maids have in secret; for I know they are much given to sloth and
uncleanness. I hope you have worked a reformation among them, as
I exhorted you in my last, and set their hearts upon better
things than they can find in junkitting and caterwauling with the
fellows of the country.

As for Win Jenkins, she has undergone a perfect metamurphysis,
and is become a new creeter from the ammunition of Humphry
Clinker, our new footman, a pious young man, who has laboured
exceedingly, that she may bring forth fruits of repentance. I
make no doubt but he will take the same pains with that pert
hussey Mary Jones, and all of you; and that he may have power
given to penetrate and instill his goodness, even into your most
inward parts, is the fervent prayer of

Your friend in the spirit,
TAB. BRAMBLE
Septr. 18.



To Dr LEWIS.

DEAR LEWIS,

Lismahago is more paradoxical than ever. -- The late gulp he had of
his native air, seems to have blown fresh spirit into all his
polemical faculties. I congratulated him the other day on the
present flourishing state of his country, observing that the
Scots were now in a fair way to wipe off the national reproach of
poverty, and expressing my satisfaction at the happy effects of
the union, so conspicuous in the improvement of their
agriculture, commerce, manufactures, and manners -- The lieutenant,
screwing up his features into a look of dissent and disgust,
commented on my remarks to this effect -- 'Those who reproach a
nation for its poverty, when it is not owing to the profligacy or
vice of the people, deserve no answer. The Lacedaemonians were
poorer than the Scots, when they took the lead among all the free
states of Greece, and were esteemed above them all for their
valour and their virtue. The most respectable heroes of ancient
Rome, such as Fabricius, Cincinnatus, and Regulus, were poorer
than the poorest freeholder in Scotland; and there are at this
day individuals in North-Britain, one of whom can produce more
gold and silver than the whole republic of Rome could raise at
those times when her public virtue shone with unrivalled lustre;
and poverty was so far from being a reproach, that it added fresh
laurels to her fame, because it indicated a noble contempt of
wealth, which was proof against all the arts of corruption -- If
poverty be a subject for reproach, it follows that wealth is the
object of esteem and veneration -- In that case, there are Jews and
others in Amsterdam and London, enriched by usury, peculation,
and different species of fraud and extortion, who are more
estimable than the most virtuous and illustrious members of the
community. An absurdity which no man in his senses will offer to
maintain. -- Riches are certainly no proof of merit: nay they are
often (if not most commonly) acquired by persons of sordid minds
and mean talents: nor do they give any intrinsic worth to the
possessor; but, on the contrary, tend to pervert his
understanding, and render his morals more depraved. But, granting
that poverty were really matter of reproach, it cannot be justly
imputed to Scotland. No country is poor that can supply its
inhabitants with the necessaries of life, and even afford
articles for exportation. Scotland is rich in natural advantages:
it produces every species of provision in abundance, vast herds
of cattle and flocks of sheep, with a great number of horses;
prodigious quantities of wool and flax, with plenty of copse
wood, and in some parts large forests of timber. The earth is
still more rich below than above the surface. It yields
inexhaustible stores of coal, free-stone, marble, lead, iron,
copper, and silver, with some gold. The sea abounds with
excellent fish, and salt to cure them for exportation; and there
are creeks and harbours round the whole kingdom, for the
convenience and security of navigation. The face of the country
displays a surprising number of cities, towns, villas, and
villages, swarming with people; and there seems to be no want of
art, industry, government, and police: such a kingdom can never
be called poor, in any sense of the word, though there may be
many others more powerful and opulent. But the proper use of
those advantages, and the present prosperity of the Scots, you
seem to derive from the union of the two kingdoms!'

I said, I supposed he would not deny that the appearance of the
country was much mended; that the people lived better, had more
trade, and a greater quantity of money circulating since the
union, than before. 'I may safely admit these premises (answered
the lieutenant), without subscribing to your inference. The
difference you mention, I should take to be the natural progress
of improvement -- Since that period, other nations, such as the
Swedes, the Danes, and in particular the French, have greatly
increased in commerce, without any such cause assigned. Before
the union, there was a remarkable spirit of trade among the
Scots, as appeared in the case of their Darien company, in which
they had embarked no less than four hundred thousand pounds
sterling; and in the flourishing state of the maritime towns in
Fife, and on the eastern coast, enriched by their trade with
France, which failed in consequence of the union. The only solid
commercial advantage reaped from that measure, was the privilege
of trading to the English plantations; yet, excepting Glasgow and
Dumfries, I don't know any other Scotch towns concerned in that
traffick. In other respects, I conceive the Scots were losers by
the union. -- They lost the independency of their state, the
greatest prop of national spirit; they lost their parliament, and
their courts of justice were subjected to the revision and
supremacy of an English tribunal.'

'Softly, captain (cried I), you cannot be said to have lost your
own parliament, while you are represented in that of Great-Britain.'
'True (said he, with a sarcastic grin), in debates of
national competition, the sixteen peers and forty-five commoners
of Scotland, must make a formidable figure in the scale, against
the whole English legislature.' 'Be that as it may (I observed)
while I had the honour to sit in the lower house, the Scotch
members had always the majority on their side.' 'I understand
you, Sir (said he), they generally side with the majority; so much
the worse for their constituents. But even this evil is not the
worst they have sustained by the union. Their trade has been saddled
with grievous impositions, and every article of living severely
taxed, to pay the interest of enormous debts, contracted by the
English, in support of measures and connections in which the
Scots had no interest nor concern.' I begged he would at least
allow, that by the union the Scots were admitted to all the
privileges and immunities of English subjects; by which means
multitudes of them were provided for in the army and navy, and
got fortunes in different parts of England, and its dominions.
'All these (said he) become English subjects to all intents and
purposes, and are in a great measure lost to their mother-country.
The spirit of rambling and adventure has been always
peculiar to the natives of Scotland. If they had not met with
encouragement in England, they would have served and settled, as
formerly, in other countries, such as Muscovy, Sweden, Denmark,
Poland, Germany, France, Piedmont, and Italy, in all which
nations their descendants continue to flourish even at this day.'

By this time my patience began to fail and I exclaimed, 'For
God's sake, what has England got by this union which, you say,
has been so productive of misfortune to the Scots.' ' Great and
manifold are the advantages which England derives from the union
(said Lismahago, in a solemn tone). First and foremost, the
settlement of the protestant succession, a point which the
English ministry drove with such eagerness, that no stone was
left unturned, to cajole and bribe a few leading men, to cram the
union down the throats of the Scottish nation, who were
surprisingly averse to the expedient. They gained by it a
considerable addition of territory, extending their dominion to
the sea on all sides of the island, thereby shutting up all back-doors
against the enterprizes of their enemies. They got an
accession of above a million of useful subjects, constituting a
never-failing nursery of seamen, soldiers, labourers, and
mechanics; a most valuable acquisition to a trading country,
exposed to foreign wars, and obliged to maintain a number of
settlements in all the four quarters of the globe. In the course
of seven years, during the last war, Scotland furnished the
English army and navy with seventy thousand men, over and above
those who migrated to their colonies, or mingled with them at
home in the civil departments of life. This was a very
considerable and seasonable supply to a nation, whose people had
been for many years decreasing in number, and whose lands and
manufactures were actually suffering for want of hands. I need
not remind you of the hackneyed maxim, that, to a nation in such
circumstances, a supply of industrious people is a supply of
wealth; nor repeat an observation, which is now received as an
eternal truth, even among the English themselves, that the Scots
who settle in South-Britain are remarkably sober, orderly, and
industrious.'

I allowed the truth of this remark, adding, that by their
industry, oeconomy, and circumspection, many of them in England,
as well as in her colonies, amassed large fortunes, with which
they returned to their own country, and this was so much lost to
South-Britain. -- 'Give me leave, sir (said he), to assure you,
that in your fact you are mistaken, and in your deduction
erroneous. Not one in two hundred that leave Scotland ever
returns to settle in his own country; and the few that do return,
carry thither nothing that can possibly diminish the stock of
South-Britain; for none of their treasure stagnates in Scotland --
There is a continual circulation, like that of the blood in the
human body, and England is the heart, to which all the streams
which it distributes are refunded and returned: nay, in
consequence of that luxury which our connexion with England hath
greatly encouraged, if not introduced, all the produce of our
lands, and all the profits of our trade, are engrossed by the
natives of South-Britain; for you will find that the exchange
between the two kingdoms is always against
Scotland; and that she retains neither gold nor silver sufficient
for her own circulation. -- The Scots, not content with their own
manufactures and produce, which would very well answer all
necessary occasions, seem to vie with each other in purchasing
superfluities from England; such as broad-cloth, velvets, stuffs,
silks, lace, furs, jewels, furniture of all sorts, sugar, rum,
tea, chocolate and coffee; in a word, not only every mode of the
most extravagant luxury, but even many articles of convenience,
which they might find as good, and much cheaper in their own
country. For all these particulars, I conceive, England may touch
about one million sterling a-year. -- I don't pretend to make an
exact calculation; perhaps, it may be something less, and
perhaps, a great deal more. The annual revenue arising from all
the private estates of Scotland cannot fall short of a million
sterling; and, I should imagine, their trade will amount to as
much more. -- I know the linen manufacture alone returns near half
a million, exclusive of the home-consumption of that article. --
If, therefore, North-Britain pays a ballance of a million
annually to England, I insist upon it, that country is more
valuable to her in the way of commerce, than any colony in her
possession, over and above the other advantages which I have
specified: therefore, they are no friends, either to England or
to truth, who affect to depreciate the northern part of the
united kingdom.'

I must own, I was at first a little nettled to find myself
schooled in so many particulars. -- Though I did not receive all
his assertions as gospel, I was not prepared to refute them; and
I cannot help now acquiescing in his remarks so far as to
think, that the contempt for Scotland, which prevails too much on
this side the Tweed, is founded on prejudice and error. -- After
some recollection, 'Well, captain (said I), you have argued
stoutly for the importance of your own country: for my part, I
have such a regard for our fellow-subjects of North-Britain, that
I shall be glad to see the day, when your peasants can afford to
give all their oats to their cattle, hogs, and poultry, and
indulge themselves with good wheaten loaves, instead of such
poor, unpalatable, and inflammatory diet.' Here again I brought
my self into a premunire with the disputative Caledonian. He said
he hoped he should never see the common people lifted out of that
sphere for which they were intended by nature and the course of
things; that they might have some reason to complain of their
bread, if it were mixed, like that of Norway, with saw dust and
fish-bones; but that oatmeal was, he apprehended, as nourishing
and salutary as wheat-flour, and the Scots in general thought it
at least as savoury. -- He affirmed, that a mouse, which, in the
article of self-preservation, might be supposed to act from
infallible instinct, would always prefer oats to wheat, as
appeared from experience; for, in a place where there was a
parcel of each, that animal has never begun to feed upon the
latter till all the oats were consumed: for their nutritive
quality, he appealed to the hale, robust constitutions of the
people who lived chiefly upon oatmeal; and, instead of being
inflammatory, he asserted, that it was a cooling sub-acid,
balsamic and mucilaginous; insomuch, that in all inflammatory
distempers, recourse was had to water-gruel, and flummery made of
oatmeal.



 


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